'Shut up' is generally bad advice

I've lost my way some years ago when, many times, I chose not to do what I really wanted and instead followed what other people belive was the right way. And I did this so often that it became almost automatic. I didn't relised it then, but I was reproducing the way I interpreted my mom's behavior. She always made decisions based on previous experiences - if something had worked for somebody else, she would consider trying it. For a long time I wasn't able to try something new, to take risks, to give myself a chance, I was too busy seeking others people's opion, their path, their "right way". I truly believed in the ideia of something being absolute right or absolute wrong. When I finally dicovered that everything is relative, I broke. My world turned upside down and I couldn't even brush my teeth without think about it. How many opportunites did lose cause I wasn't able to follow my instincts? How many opportunites did I lose cause I let someone e...

Desencontro

Sendo moça de poucos amores, ela não sabe onde procurar
em memória sua,
qual o gatilho usar,
pra lidar com história essa de nem mesmo conseguir respirar
quando a ver passar.
Incessantemente busca por uma experiência antes vivida,
uma atitude antes tomada,
mas em vista da frustração decide
fechar os olhos e imaginar
o que agora fará.
Desenha, projeta, articula tudo.
Enquanto andarilhos sem sorte procuram nos olhos dela desejo.
Insistem.
Iludem-se.
E ficam.
Permanecem olhando para ela, conversam.
Enquanto ela deles surda, muda e cega,
ainda projeta, articula e desenha.
De corpo presente.
De mente viajante
De dúvida constante:
Como conquistar aquela que dela,
tirou o fôlego.

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